The spy, the facade and the ousting

Well I was figured out.

My spanish teacher at the language school pulled me aside tonight after class and "suggested" I move to a lower level course. I thought I was doing so well of pretending like I knew what was going on but apparently she wasn't to be made a fool of by the girl who couldn't answer questions because she couldn't take her eyes away from a riveting page in the dictionary.

 In reality, I'm pretty sure everyone in that classroom knew I shouldn't have been there. They were all way too friendly and would try and talk with me before and after class. They asked things in their ridiculously fast, grammarically correct Spanish, and instead of repeatedly asking/whispering "Que? Que?" in front of the spanish spy- I mean teacher, I would just choose one of a few replies I had in stock to distract them. Sometimes I would answer "si si" if I felt it was a positive agreeing kind of conversation we were supposedly having and other times I would throw in a " si, claro" (yes, of course). Most of the time, I just nodded and gave mmmmmm's or excused myself for a perfectly timed coughing spout. However, I never use "No" during one of these mystery conversations. You give yourself right away if you give a direct "No." They might try to pry at you like "Oh, porque no?" because they love to push their pleasantries into conversations. And then you are required to give some kind of put together sentence-answer that indicates you have a half a brain and were understanding the conversation. Its very chancey to give a No. Best to stick with the mmmmm's and shoulder shrugs. Yet, even so your teacher will discover you another way because they are trained to find imposters of the Spanish language, such as myself.

For me that other way, was reading an in class written assignment aloud. In the past, I never dreamed I would become a martyr but who was I to know my own destiny? I won't go into detail but it was horrendous. We were supposed to write a letter to a future employer and use a more formal, professional vocabulary. The other students had lavish sentences with perfect "ustedes" verb conjugations and compound sentences patting themselves on the back. I, on the other hand, "liked" things about the job and thought I would be a "good" candidate if they would "meet" me sometime. Of course, I couldn't think of the word interview when I desperately needed it. I don't think I got the job. Or the grade.

The best part of the event was when the spy asked how many languages I knew. After voicing what she already knew, (that I only spoke English) she shook her head and said sweetly "that must be why its so hard for you." I think my jaw dropped. I wanted to pout and say " Well in the U.S. you get a gold medal and lifetime praise for even attempting a second language!" Unfortunately, I am the only American so no one could relate to this phenomenon because they are all well into their third or fourth or who cares what number- language. And for them, it's a modest acheivment. Like finding conjoined peanut M&Ms. I thought I was in line for succession of company ownership.

 But in my defense, all those students have lived here for several years and they have pretty good reason to be such bad asses at spanish. And even though they were horrible accomplices in my facade (they were always explaining things to me quietly during class when I looked dazed, thus tipping off the spy even more) they were all very friendly to me. And Carmen San Diego is actually a really nice teacher and told me I could stay if I wanted to, and I would have told her "No thank you I don't like really experiencing daggers to my self-esteem three times a week for two hours."
But I didn't know how to say that, so I replied "Mmmmm, si si."

Try inserting a "No" in that scenario and I think you would agree with me, it just sandpapers the convo.

Anyway, off to stumble around some more in Spanish.